The preemptive strike

No, this is not about nuclear war or WW2 stories. It’s about your upcoming divorce, the chances are at least 50:50. Time and again men are totally surprised when their ‘beloved’, together with your kids moves out over night, leaving the divorce papers on the kitchen table, or has you removed from your home by police due to some domestic violence allegation. This shall be some kind of tutorial (read PS3, below) about how you can avoid the worst. And NO again, the divorce is not the worst, but the consequences of divorce are.

I hope this article becomes meaningful only for an ever diminishing minority. The new default must be: DO NOT MARRY EVER !!! Also, don’t have kids, as long as not at least the 3 political conditions at the end of this article are met. About half of the younger generation already come from a broken home, but they often still hold on to the illusion that they, themselves can manage marriage better, unlike their parents. As I said, this quite often is an illusion. Please do yourself a favor and accept reality as it is; take off the rose colored glasses. It’s like playing Russian roulette with a 90% chance to loose.

Your run-of-the-mill marriage (w/o prenup) is a ‘community of accrued gains’. This is, as a rule, very disadvantageous for the soon-to-be ex-husband. Quite often the wife earns nothing at all (due to staying at home with the kids) or earns very little compared to you (due to chronic disinclination to work, or bec. her qualification lacks economic applicability, like e.g. her being an archaeologist). Everything that the husband earned through overtime work, advanced training and development, career steps and personal savings – without assistance of his wife – will be equally shared with his ex-wife. Even if his wife, during marriage, has never saved a penny, has blown all money on shoes, purses and beauty products; she’ll get half of what HE saved. Incredible, but that’s how it is.

The goal of the preemptive strike is to secure your hard earned assets and to minimize possible alimony and child support payments. Every husband should do this, even if he’s still happily married. All around the world it’s possible, for a few hundred bucks, to establish a corporation without having your own name appear in any official documents. Many lawyers can act as trustees and there’s nothing illegal about it. Of course you should investigate your lawyer-trustee beforehand; don’t fall for a shyster, choose a reputable law firm. You may also have to become familiar with the special laws of the country in which you choose to establish your corp. You must know how much damage your trustee could cause and how fast you can/must react in case shit happens.

You transfer your savings onto the account of your new corporation and invest it as you did before on your local bank. All returns on investment should be re-invested. Avoid that any gains are transferred back to your home bank account; also refuse to receive any mail from your ‘offshore’ bank or trustee. Most international banks are largely paper-free in their client communication, you’ll have a safe E-mail account for that. I won’t comment much on how to deal with your taxes, just avoid getting on the radar of your country’s IRS – they can me more of a pain-in-the-ass than your ex-wife. Usually no-one is interested in your account statements, but your soon-to-be ex-wife will be, as soon as she’s made up her mind about the divorce. Don’t print them out, but if you have to, then buy a document shredder. Much better leave them on your secure E-mail account. If you’re so stupid as to have a joint account, would you please use this only for the grocery and house related bills (set overdraft to ZERO), don’t use it for your income. The less she knows, the better for you when the shit hits the fan.

Now there are some paranoids (which would include me) who do what I described in the last paragraph twice. You establish two corps (as the case may be in two different countries), whereas the first corp acts like a service hatch for the second corp. In case the first corp is busted – e.g. because your ex-wife hired a really smart detective, or because you bragged about it in a drunken stupor to a buddy, or the IRS is on your heels – the account of the first corp is empty. If the first corp is in another country, the nosy party’s inquiries will take a while, if they are not totally ignored by the bank, and you’ll have enough time to repeat the whole procedure with two new corps. Most banks also offer safe deposit boxes for gold, coins and art collections for acceptable fees.

Now your liquid assets are safe and your ‘accrued gains’ are zero. But many people own a house or flat. Those who dutifully paid off their property for the last 10, 20 years, during which your fair maiden crumbled cookies on the couch, still have a chance. As soon as she moved out, or you have been removed, well as soon as you have clear indications that the unavoidable will happen, go to the bank or lender. Try to get the maximum loan for your property that’s possible. If it’s joint property you’re usually effed. Nevertheless try it, try it with a different bank or lender. If you succeed stop paying installments asap. The cash goes directly to your offshore corp.

If your divorce court judge asks what happened to all that money, you admit, under tears (of joy) that your investment adviser conned you into buying these silly naked warrants and that it’s all gone now, and you’re gonna sue this a-hole. Or you’ve covered up your gambling addiction all these years and now it’s all come to an end – poor you – , women lie all the time in family court, with impunity, we men must forgive ourselves a little white lie now, don’t we.

Next step, you go to your employer and ask to reduce your working hours. It often takes a year or more until the divorce is final. You have so much stress now, with the new apartment, the kids separated, you just have to economize your available time. After the divorce is through, you’ll sure be back full throttle ahead. You might also convince your boss to reduce your pay and instead finance your extension studies for a year. Your annual income must go down. If your boss doesn’t play, it’s better to quit and get a new job. You are psychologically exhausted after a separation. This is always fully accepted for a women, who just moves from the cookie-crumble-couch of your house to the couch of her new apartment, but the man is expected to be stoic and ‘man up’. Basically everything you earn now can be seized by the court for your ex-wife. So why would you work like a madman if you might just have enough left to eat. Make an appointment with a psychologist or even a psychiatrist in order to demonstrate that you do everything to overcome your problems and get out of this desperate situation.

Keep doing this until your court date comes up. What you do after that mainly depends on how much your ex-wife, her attorney and the family court torment you. If they, during this year, perceive that they can’t possibly get much out of you; if they accept marginal payments and you can see your kids regularly, everything is fine. If they, however, try to fleece you every which way, you have to prepare the exit from your home country. I won’t go further into this. Detlef Bräunig has done this already exceptionally well (but sorry it’s in German only) —> Deutschlandflucht = escape from Germany

Political stuff:

In order for marriage to make any sense again to any man, marriage laws have to be changed and a lot of divorce laws have to go into the shredder. My three major points are:

1.) Child support must be limited to what the government would be paying if there was no father. This is usually a lot less (if anything at all) than what the courts order the ex-husband to pay. Often enough the requested payments are not in accordance with any law, but just common practice among lawyers and judges. The whole shenanigans have no basis in law and may even depend on the mood of the judge. It’s ridiculous. If the father will see his kids regularly, he will give them what they want anyway. If the ex-wife sabotages contact he is a father in name only, he’s just the guy who pays – but for what?

2.) Joint custody must be the gold standard. It may only be revoked if one of the parents perpetrates criminal acts towards the kids, not based on hearsay but based on proof. This way the whole lying helper industry, with psychologists, CPS (see PS1) and the never ending custody battles can be reduced to near zero. These people cost lots of money and taxes and only work towards alienating the kids from their father and thus actually harming these kids. It would also end child support. If one parent really doesn’t want to take custody, he may fall back to paying child support (see point 1 above). The perpetrator of parental child abduction must be punished quickly and harshly. Nothing what happens today in custody battles is ever for the good of the child, but lawyers and judges just love to hide behind that expression.

3.) End alimony completely. If a couple separates each one has to take care of himself. How two independent humans would become so dependent on each other, that one has to keep on paying for the other after separation is inexplicable. If the couple has kids and the mother stays at home, she automatically is provided for by her husband. But that she stays at home is an agreement between the two. After separation/divorce there is obviously no more agreement. Each goes his own way and works for himself.

PS1: A remaining task for the CPS could be to help quarreling parents to overcome their difficulties and focus on their joint custody, instead like today helping the mother to finally get rid of the father. CPS should mainly focus on their original task, which is to help children. Children who are beaten, neglected and abused. They need good psychologists and investigators instead of Maoist warrior-lesbians or feminist hobby-voodoo-psychologists.

PS2: I’m sure that a party (probably not in the U.S.) which accepts the above 3 points will soon have at least 50% of all men on their side. In countries with more than two parties, the largest minority party often has less than 25% of the votes. Half of all men voting for such a party could achieve 25% as well. Especially the so called ‘right wing’ parties and even classic conservatives may emerge as a real alternative if they adopt such policies. This may also move fringe parties away from the feminist doctrine that smothers everything. Other MRA topics may follow. The equity politics is anti-equality. Particularly family law would need a heavy dose of real equality.

PS3: I’m not responsible for what you actually do. If you follow my ‘tutorial’ and shit happens, it’s your fault, not mine. I’m not a lawyer and don’t want to be one. If you find major errors, you’re invited to put it in a comment or discuss them in your own blog.